The new year is here and I can't believe it is 2014! Where did the last year go!? I am glad to be in a new year and am looking forward to a new journey in my life. Today I have been doing some soul searching and I have had a light bulb moment.
I think I learned a lot in 2013, probably more in that year than any other and I would like to take all of the positive, and the not so positive, lessons learned and use that knowledge in this new year. I have had some major turn of events happen and some horrific hurt and loss, but I need to accept what I cannot change and move forward. I am not saying that the hurt will magically disappear, but I will learn to live with it. We teach people how to treat us and I taught certain people well. I have spent so many years of my life letting people dictate what they think I should be, or what I should have done and I chose to let them make me feel bad about myself. I have allowed people to verbally abuse me, lie about me and I always let it go for fear of them not liking me or having them leave me, but I realize now that it is far better to be alone, than to be with people and still be alone. This is not just in relationships, it can be with family and friends too. They are there when there is something in it for them, but nowhere to be found when you need them. People that live in glass houses should not throw stones!
What I have learned along the way is that I am who I am.... a very strong, giving, compassionate and loyal person. There are, or were up until now, people in my life that could not walk a day in my shoes, especially during my hardest times and I got through it with dignity and grace, without whining or giving up. I have learned that the people in my life right now are the ones that mean the most and are the ones that have earned my trust and loyalty. The people I have chosen to not be a part of my life anymore, have earned that too. I can only be my true self and carry on.
As I look back over the last 59 years of my life, I have paid my dues, tolerated way to much and now it is time to change that. I will stand tall! It is like a weight has been lifted and now the time has come to be the best that I can be!
I wish all my true family and friends a very Happy New Year and that you will be the best that you can be too!
Debbie : )
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